I find myself at a place in the road that requires concentration lest I fall off the side and into the mud. I am learning that this writing “business” contains layers and facets that I am not well versed in.
Call it the human side of writing. The personal side. The side that comes out at 3 a.m. on one of those long nights of the soul. That is a precious commodity. It’s the voice, the one that whispers to me and then eventually screams.
It is this thing that I believe to be at the very core of artistic endeavor, it is carnal and raw but honest. It can be ugly or scary or beautiful. It is essential, it is like breath, but it is easily lost and with its loss comes a loss of ones true nature.
I have always prided myself an independent thinker. A person who went against the common tide and came up with my own unique take. I’ve been wrong many times but I have always been true to myself and others. I’m bull-headed but honest, I’m flawed but pure….
….It’s a slippery slope and it is easy to slide…..
I thought I had this quality in spades and my ego grew like a big fat balloon. This honesty I have always prided myself on, this writing from the heart was lost yesterday. I stopped listening to my heart. I lost myself on the side of the road. I spilled my integrity all over the street and now I have mud all over me.
Saturday I sent out a post that was not up to my standards or anyone else’s for that matter. This fluff piece about a movie is garbage. I am not qualified to write anything on the subject of movies, nor do I want to be qualified. Just because I like a movie doesn’t mean I should expect anyone to read such insignificant tripe. I apologise to you and myself for this.
I was not being true to either one of us. I am truly sorry. I promise that I will never write any such thing again.
From now on it’s just me. No crappy junk, no compromise, no dumbing down, all the strange pages of weird stuff are going and I will just concentrate on what I do best.
Thanks for listening. Strawberryindigo.