A Good Cry

“Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts.”
― Charles Dickens

The light streams through the blinds and tickles my eyelids. I am slowly pulled from a nasty dream brought on by last night’s wicked storm. The faint melody of birdsong rouses me to full consciousness. I waken refreshed and renewed. With a slow lumbering yawn and cat-like stretch I move closer to the window. The streets are still wet with last nights revelry. They glitter and shine in the morning’s surprise sun.

The world seems  fresh and new after a long rain. As the sun shines it graces everything with a wee bit of hopefulness. It’s as if the sky has had a good cry and is now sporting a beaming shiny bright smile.

I myself always feel good after a good cry. I suppose that is why it is called that: a good cry. I have always been the sensitive type; prone to cry easily and at times for what I will later deem silly reasons. I used to be ashamed of my sensitivity. I hid it well behind a veneer of fake indifference but now I am proud of my sensitive nature. I know I am far from the only one who feels the way I do.

Crying is basic. It is humbling and very human.  It puts us in touch with our very basic of needs. It makes us vulnerable. It is generally thought of an activity of one who is sad but sometimes the act of crying can denote joy.

Tears of Joy
Tears of Joy

I have cried at the birth of both of my children. The first time this took me by surprise as tears of pure joy often do. I have also shed tears for the normal reasons of loss and rejection….misfortune, unfairness and at times simple frustration. I have wept at the loss of loved ones and upon witnessing the death of a tiny bird on my front steps.

Music makes me cry, certain songs do it every time. These I generally avoid, except on certain rare occasions.

I always feel better after I do. Crying is good for you.

And this is not just in my imagination. Many scientists agree with the theory that emotional crying is the body’s way of ridding itself of toxins and waste products that build up in times of elevated stress. The phrase “having a good cry” suggesting that the act can make one feel better physically and emotionally better is not far off the mark.

Crying is a great way to release pent up emotions, frustrations and stress. It restores the mind to a quieter place. Holding your emotions in can be dangerous over the long-term. In fact, research indicates that stifling emotional tears can cause elevated risk of heart disease and hypertension.

tears boy in public domain

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The Three Types of Tears

“In fact, three types of tears exist, all with different purposes. Basal tears are omnipresent in our eyes. These constant tears are what keep our eyes from drying out completely.
The second type is reflex tears, which serve to protect the human eye from harsh irritants such as smoke, onions or even a very strong, dusty wind.
Reflex tears are generally found to be about 98 percent water, whereas several chemicals are commonly present in emotional tears [Source: The Daily Journal. First is a protein called prolactin, which is also known to control breast milk production. Adrenocorticotropic hormones are also common and indicate high stress levels. The other chemical found in emotional tears is leucine-enkephalin, an endorphin that reduces pain and works to improve mood.
The third type of tears is emotional tears. It all starts in the cerebrum where sadness is registered. The endocrine system is then triggered to release hormones to the ocular area, which then causes tears to form. Emotional tears are common among people who see Bambi’s mother die or who suffer personal losses.”
                                                                                               *Courtesy of HowStuffWorks.com

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Soldier Crying IraqColorLineNews (1)
Real men cry.

I think society treats males unfairly when it comes to the issue of crying and emotions in general. It is crazy, nonproductive and downright unrealistic to think that boys and men do not have feelings. Men may deny they have them to each other but we mothers and wives and sisters know better.

Having emotions are not exclusive to one gender  but showing and sharing them is. In most societies, tears in men are seldom acceptable.  Boys learn early on it’s not kosher to show emotion, as it is considered a weakness and thus they grow up to be men who are cut off from expressing emotions of grief that can help them heal from emotional wounds. Anger becomes the preferred emotion because it is considered to be more “male”. (I don’t need to tell anyone how that is all working out.)

We as a people are in constant change. We have evolved and adapted to our circumstances. I do think we as a species are on the road to enlightenment but is a long one. Despite the harshness of the state of the world and apparent accelerating violence everywhere, I do believe that on a one-to-one individual basis people are growing kinder, gentler and more tolerant. In my own experience living on this planet for 44 years I have noticed this trend and it is encouraging. The acceptance of the showing of emotion is just one aspect of this shift.

“Those who do not weep, do not see.”

Victor Hugo

Strawberryindigo.

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“Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.”
― Tina Fey 
 
 

“Those who do not weep, do not see.” ― Victor Hugo

 
 

Related YouTube.

Make You Feel My LOVE  by Adele

Wuthering Heights Lover’s Last Scene

The Sky is Crying  by Stevie Ray Vaughn

The Tracks of My Tears by Smokey Robinson 

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 References, Related Articles and Interesting Tidbits

Do animals cry?  (news.discovery.com)

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Why Cry? Evolutionary Biologists Show Crying Can Strengthen Relationships  (Sciencedaily.com)

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Why is it so hard for men to cry? (psychcentral.com)

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 How Crying Works _Hoyt, Alia.  “How Crying Works”  02 July 2008.  HowStuffWorks.com. <http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/crying.htm&gt;  17 February 2014.

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Crying  (wikipedia.org)

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Why do People Cry? (wisegeek.com)

 

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SBI’s Tips for Instant Health and Easy Weight Loss

Haha….got you with the title didn’t I? I’d like to think I fooled you but I know you are too smart for that, but it did get your attention did it not?  I’m not above cheap theatrics; I’ll freely admit, but I do have a bit to say on this subject because there are many who do fall for this sort of nonsense all the time.

The quick and the easy

People want big results with little or no work. It’s an American thing, this instant gratification. Pair it with another very American thing; our fixation on looks, endless youth and vitality. We are talking some serious stars and stripes here.

We are a nation obsessed with health or at the least the appearance of health. People want others to think they are really healthier and more together than they really are. We  have this desperate need to show others what a full life we are leading,  jam packed with triumph, success and over-the-top uniquely unique experiences.

What trumps being perfect is at least looking perfect….and we are a self loathing society.  33.3 % of Americans are overweight and 35.9% percent are considered obese. Our ideal of beauty does not configure to the perfection that most of us can never live up to.

strong-woman-vintage exercise

This is not to say that being overweight is not a health hazard, it is, but there are a number of other factors that contribute to good health and beauty for that matter than just what is considered the ideal weight and shape.

I have spent most of my life hung up on my weight. Starting with my first diet at the age of 9, continuing on through my teenage years and then onward into my adulthood. I was caught up in the angst of weight worry and denial. Following one crazy dieting idea after another. Denying myself and denying in general that the way I was going about it was well, stupid and all so wrong.  I once spent two years of my life, two years..denying myself ice cream, yes ice cream!

Like so many others my self-worth was hung up on body image.  I would compare myself to the ideal airbrushed “perfection” the media feeds us all. Of course I could never come close. No one can.

vintage woman tape worm diet exer

There are a million promises from a million sources who will tell you they are the ones with the secret to slim perfection. Just promise to pay the shipping and handling and it will be sent out immediately.  One thing these empty promises provide is at the most, false hope with none of the hard work or willpower that accompanies eating a sensible diet, getting regular moderate exercise, time and patience. Nothing is easy and nothing is free. (except for love)

Sometimes there is temporary success but these fad diets and insensible lifestyles are difficult to keep up. It is easy to feel like a failure. It is also quite common for let-down people to comfort themselves with food and overindulging,…the very activity that is a major culprit in weight gain.

because of fat women exercise vintage

It’s big business; The health and weight loss industry. Add the beauty and fashion industry and you have a powerful bloc of economic players and reapers of piles and piles of big money. These companies get richer while we get more unhealthy.

They play on our fears and insecurities; pointing out what we “lack” and selling us a bottle of the stuff. Let’s stop buying it.

Tell them to keep it and let it rot on the shelves until they see that there is nothing lacking in us– it is they who lack. They lack the obvious; they cannot see the beauty that is inside us all. What a shame is that. Let us not be manipulated any longer…

We are all beautiful. Damn what they say, that  media which feeds us stale perfection for us to consume.

quote beauty old-smiling-woman

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!

YOU are a beautiful being.  Believe this. Know it.

Some people have a spark; a special something that transcends the physical.  It is the belief in oneself.

What matters is one’s inside. It is the light of the soul and the love in the heart.

Beauty has a way of shining through.

Beauty is kindness and compassion. Beauty is strength and resilience. Beauty is devotion and gentleness. Beauty is quiet. It doesn’t declare itself it.

Beauty just is.

Strawberryindigo.

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people vintage girl smile flickr

 References and Related Articles

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How Does it Feel to be One of the Beautiful People?  (strawberryindigo.wordpress.com)

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Diets Through History: The Good, The Bad And The Bizarre  (huffingtonpost.com)

Food Faddism (Wikipedia)

10 things the weight loss industry won’t tell you (smartmoney.com)

The Facts on Fad Diets (everydayhealth.com)

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This has been the 200th post on this blog. (Yay!)

Fresh Quotes: LOVE RUMI

His words were simple and earthy. Words that came straight to the point, jutting out at odd angles, all the while meandering along the sandy bank, flowing along with the gentle stream.  Words that  reflected a quiet beauty; a oneness with nature conveyed in tiny jagged pieces that formed an exquisite mosaic of thought and feeling.

He wrote of love in such a simple and honest way and his words have inspired countless romantics on their quest to find their other half.

The general theme of Rumi’s thought, like that of other mystic and Sufi poets of Persian literature, is essentially that of the concept of tawhid — union with his beloved (the primal root) from which/whom he has been cut off and become aloof — and his longing and desire to restore it.

All the quotes that follow are his…

light-beings-norman-free rumi

Daylight, full of small dancing particles. Can you see them when I whisper in your ear? 

red candle

“There is a candle in your heart, ready to be kindled.
There is a void in your soul, ready to be filled.
You feel it, don’t you?” 

Tranquility field

 

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field.

I’ll meet you there

When the soul lies down in that grass

The world is too full to talk about

soulmate love

“The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere.
They’re in each other all along.”

Love-eye-to-eye

“The most alive moment comes when those who love each other meet each other’s eyes and in what flows between them.”

love sun 888

In your light I learn how to love. In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest where no-one sees you, but sometimes I do, and that sight becomes this art.”

 

w-sensual-Soft-kissing-Couples-Love-kisses-heartz_large

Lovers find secret places inside this violent world where they make transactions with beauty.

Reason says nonsense.

I have walked and measured the walls here, there are no places like that.

Love says, there are.

love snails art

“Wherever you are, and whatever you do, be in love.”

Always-Have-A-Dream-In-Your-Heart

Here’s to green fields and sunshine, blue skies ,timeless poetry and infinite LOVE ♥

Happy February

May this romantic month bring you your heart’s desire.

Strawberryindigo

mawlana_rumi

Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Balkhī , also known as Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī  and more popularly in the English-speaking world simply as Rumi (September 30, 1207 – December 17 1273) was a 13th-century Persian poet, jurist, theologian, and Sufi mystic.  Rumi’s importance is considered to transcend national and ethnic borders. His poems have been widely translated into many of the world’s languages and transposed into various formats. In 2007, he was described as the “most popular poet in America.

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  RUMI ( wikipedia.org)

Related YOU TUBE

My heart – Rumi

I Knew I Loved You ~ Savage Garden

ADELE – ‘Make You Feel My Love’

Entangled Hearts Red White Blended Background